Working on Happily Ever After

What we did on our summer vacation

2009-08-18T14:43:00.000-07:00

Now, I had great intentions of writing about our vacation while we were on it but I wanted to include pictures so had to wait. So here is the first installment of "Hawaii--with teenagers."

First, I've been to Hawaii once before--30 years ago. I went with my two sisters, a friend and her friend. It was a great trip and I've wanted to go back ever since. We spent most of our time at Waikiki and on Oahu but did take a quick (very quick, all in one day)trip to the Big Island to visit the Volcano National Park and to Maui for a sunset luau.

Planning the trip: I love this part. I have so much fun reading about the place we are to visit and picking the activities I think my family will enjoy. I first started planning the trip to Hawaii 5 years ago. We had our flights and hotels booked and then had the house fire. Since then, we haven't been able to get the hotel and airline tickets using points until this year.

For anyone interested in visiting Hawaii or just reading about it I recommend the series of guidebooks on the islands by Andrew Doughty published by Wizard Publications. They have one on The Big Island, one on Oahu, one on Maui, and one on Kauai. I used Hawaii, The Big Island Revealed and Oahu Revealed. I'm seriously considering buying the other two because one day I hope to go there and it's so much fun reading these books.

So first stop, Oahu because the main thing DH wanted to do in Hawaii and the reason he's always dreamed of going there was to visit Pearl Harbor.

We got up and were out of the house by 3:30am to catch our 5:25 am flight. We went Richmond to Charlotte, Charlotte to Phoenix and Phoenix to Honolulu. Later this year there will be direct flights from Charlotte to Hawaii. When I was planning this I figured we'd be so excited that we would want to go for a walk on the beach or a swim that afternoon. The guys told me, no way don't plan anything for that day because we'll be wiped out. And they were right. By the time we got the rental car, went to the hotel and checked in what little energy we had left was gone. We ate dinner at the hotel buffet(and it was better than I'd expected from the guidebook's review, we all enjoyed our food) Then the boys went up to the rooms and DH very kindly walked across the street to the beach with me.

Waikiki and Honolulu are very different than I remembered

Merry Christmas to All

2008-12-21T15:33:00.000-08:00

TA DA

2008-12-12T13:53:00.000-08:00

Once again, I'm done. Thank you McB, McB's mom, BCB, CMS and my critique partners Alleyne and Diane for all your feedback and help.

The last full, which needs to be sent snail mail, won't get out until Monday because I had a brainstorm last night and decided the black moment would be blacker if done in the antagonist's POV. So today I rewrote it. It works. I hope. I've been reading and rereading. Going over comments and adjusting and editing and revising to the point when I can't really assess it any more.

I'm going to wait to hear back from the partials (or until Feb 1st) before starting to send out cold queries.

And I'm ready to move on to the next project. After I clean the house and decorate and bake and do all that holiday stuff.

Clearing and Cleaning

2008-11-30T10:23:00.000-08:00

I've been spending the last couple of days clearing stuff from our bedroom and cleaning. When I'm busy writing, I let things pile up. I can take it for a while then it starts to stifle my creativity. So I decided to work on clearing things out of the room and my mind. So far, I've cleaned the closet, packed up summer things and gotten a trash bag of clothes to take to Goodwill. I've gone through a large box of cds and photos that's been sitting in our bedroom since last Dec. My dresser top is cleared. Next it's my bookshelves and vanity and two boxes on the floor.

I've thought of some places I need to work on in Body Language and tomorrow, I'll start going through it again for the last time before sending off the requested full manuscripts.

I still hope to get them off by Friday, but this week is turning out busier than I had planned. I have a dentist appt and an appointment with the satellite TV people Tues. Wed. is critique group and Christmas shopping. Thurs my dad has two doctor's appts and I'm going with my mom to help her. The plan is to work on the book tomorrow, Tues afternoon and Thurs afternoon and hopefully to print it out on Friday and mail it. But if necessary, I'll work during next weekend and get it out at the beginning of the following week. The important thing is to feel confident of what I'm sending off. I don't expect the agents and editors will be looking at what I send until after the holidays, but I want it off so I can move on to revising the second book.

So decorating is going to have to wait until this is done. And the house is clean.

Thanksgiving

2008-11-24T17:54:00.000-08:00

All my chickens are home to the roost and I'm thankful for my boys and my wonderful husband who supports my writing and has never asked when I was going to get a job that brought in actual cash money. And he just laughs when I say I'm going to clean the house now the book is done. Got to love him and I do.

I've had people say they just can't identify with heroines who fall in love within the first few hours, days, weeks they meet the hero. They say it takes longer. You have to really know someone before you can love them.

Settle around your computers and sip your cup of mulled wine, tea, or hot chocolate and I'll tell you my story. Back when I was young, I threw myself into my career as a dietitian. I loved my work, served in professional organizations, worked with the local Heart Association teaching cooking classes and working on heart healthy restaurants, and did worked after hours as a consultant. When I was thirty, I took a good look at my life and decided it was lacking something I wanted, a man to love and a family. So I decided to put some of the energy I'd been funneling into my career into my social life.

I resigned from my position in the professional organization, I agreed to blind dates, and to shut up the friends and family, who said I must not be looking very hard or else I was too picky, I joined a dating service. It was expensive. Very. (More for women than men, I discovered later.) But I decided to do it because I wasn't meeting many eligible men who had the same interests as I did.

Interesting experience. If you decide to go this route, don't be afraid of being a sqeaky wheel. If I hadn't gotten on the phone and complained they would never have decided to shut me up by sending me a better selection. (Because I didn't want the guy with the panty hose fetish or the one who weeped over the phone about the wife who recently left him, go figure.)

I don't know how it goes with the computer dating services now, but back in the old days (1985), they sent the women the phone numbers and you chose if you called or not. So I called the new set and made dates with all of them. Meet in a public place, drive separately, be safe. Four nice guys. But there was this one. We talked on Feb. 10th and set up a lunch date for the 12th. Turns out we both worked downtown and our offices were two blocks apart.

I walked into the city hall where we were to meet and looked up the escalator at the only guy in sight. ( I don't know, maybe there were other guys but I didn't see them.) He was coming down, talking and laughing with a woman on the floor above. Dark hair, long overcoat, broad shoulders. Oh, please let him be my lunch date. He was. We went out to lunch, talked, talked, talked. I must have eaten something, but can't remember what. He walked me back to my office holding my hand. We made another date for Friday night. (Valentine's Day, but neither of us mentioned that)

I think I floated upstairs. I called a girlfriend and told her I was probably crazy, but I'd just met the man I was going to marry. Then I said I knew that was nuts and I knew it couldn't be possible, but...

Friday it snowed. We're talking central Virginia here not the northern states. Measurable snowfall is the exception not the rule. There was more than six inches on the ground before six p.m. (Schools close and people strip grocery store shelves of bread and milk for 1 inch.) I got dressed for dinner expecting any minute to get a phone call cancelling. He was late. But he came. In fact he missed my house and had to help a driver who spun out, go up a large hill and come back down then make it up my driveway which was steep in order to appear at my door. Luckily, he grew up in NJ and went to school in Indiana so snow wasn't a barrier. We went out to dinner to a Chinese restaurant we both loved and sat there almost alone with the snow falling outside the windows and talked. And talked. And talked.

He didn't kiss me goodnight. (Told me later he was afraid to for fear he'd screw things up), but did ask me out again. We were engaged by Easter and married in August, 22 years ago. And I love him more than I did then.

So this Thanksgiving I'm thankful for the love in my life. The love of my parents who had a love story that should be immortalized. The love of my husband, my boys, my family and my frieds. I am blessed and very lucky and I know it.

I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

The End

2008-11-18T15:46:00.000-08:00

The rewrite is done and the full is off to two of my writer friends who offered to be delta readers. Most writers call them beta readers, but I'm a Cherry Bomb and we have delta readers.

It felt wonderful to write the end the first time through. But it doesn't compare to this time. The book is so much better than it was thanks to all the feedback I've gotten from delta readers, contest judges and my critique partners.

Updates on the conferences I went to where I pitched to editors and agents. I've had requests for partials from two agents and, drumroll, requests for fulls from an agent and two editors. I'm beyond thrilled. I know this doesn't mean they'll call and beg to have it, but it's another step on the path to being published. Getting requests for fulls means they like the premise of the story and I hope that I've impressed them as a writer serious about my craft and my career.

I'll be sending the partials off by Friday of this week. The fulls will go off after I get the feedback from my readers. What's next? Well, this story ended on Christmas Eve and there is a holiday story there begging to be told. And what better time of year to get started on that. Then I have the second story in this series to rewrite and my ghost story. I have plenty to keep me busy.

I've always wanted to write books. And nothing compares with having someone tell you they love the story, the characters, and can't wait to see what happens next.

Excuse me now. I've got a Snoopy dance to do.

Not Quite There

2008-09-30T14:13:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm not finished with the rewrite but I'm much farther along than I would have been without the deadline I set for myself.

Having the deadline gave me the push I needed to keep writing a little longer each day and to write even on days when the words weren't flowing.

Since I last posted, I've written 8542 words. I'm at 89,791 and 308 pages.

I'm very pleased.

One of the things I didn't take into consideration when I set my deadline and goal is that rewriting is part of the editing process. It's not like Nanowrimo where you are turning off your internal editor so you can get the ideas down. I've done that part with this book. Now, I'm working on making it the best it can be. So I had to take the scenes I'd already written and look at them. What's that scene's purpose? What is the goal, motivation and conflict for the characters in this scene. Does it move the book along or is it just chatter?

Doing this slows the process. But that's okay because my goal is not just a word count. It's a good book.

I'm going to the NJRW conference the last weekend in October. This rewrite will be done then.

So reassessed deadline. Complete the rewrite by October 22nd. I might be able to get it done before but I'm trying to be realistic. This weekend will be spent with friends. I'm planning to get some writing done but it's a revitalization weekend not a writing retreat. There are also several appointments, dentist, kid's doctor, hair the following week and a conference that weekend.

So my goal for between now and this coming Sunday is 2500 words. Maybe I can do more and get this next chapter done.

Progress Report

2008-09-21T14:15:00.000-07:00

7128 words this week. I hit a snag with a new scene I added and spent a couple of days working it out. I might not finish the book by the 30th but I'll be close. Having the deadline pushes me to write more than I would without it.

As my friends commented, making progress and doing more than I would have without the deadline and goals is what is important

More realistic goal for next week, 8,000 words.

Week One--Progress toward Deadline

2008-09-14T14:20:00.000-07:00

I worked on the book 6 out of 7 days this week. Yesterday, I rewrote most of the chapter I'd written Thursday because I wasn't happy with it. If I add those words in I wrote 9,014 words this week but only 7653 toward my projected 95,000 words. Though this averages below my goal of 1500-2000 words, I'm pleased because I pushed myself.

This rewrite may make the book a bit shorter. We'll see. Using 95,000 words as my guide I have 22,290 words to go. Since life happens and writing 5 days a week is more realistic than 7, I really need to shoot for 2000 words a day.

I believe I'll go back and try to finish this chapter today.

Day 2

2008-09-09T15:52:00.000-07:00

Didn't get quite as much done today but met my goal. 1520 words. When I'm doing rewrites like this, I print a copy that I work from as I edit. I didn't realize last night that I needed to print Part Three so that's what I had to do first. For some reason, this computer has to reinstall the printer every time I go to print. Grrr.

Good luck to everyone who has shared their deadlines. One small deadline at a time and we'll get there.

Deadlines

2008-09-08T13:24:00.000-07:00

A friend and fellow writer wrote about setting deadlines for herself on her blog--writeiam@ blogspot.com. It made me think. I too set deadlines but too often don't keep them. So I'm setting this one publicly.

I'm going to finish my rewrite of Body Language by Sept. 30th. This year. Why that date? I have three conferences in Oct and Nov where I'm going to pitch the book. I'm also ready to finish with this and move on to the next book.

How am I going to make it? I'm going to explain to my family what I'm doing. I'm going to write first. If I have to go somewhere that day, I'll get up earlier to write. And I'll report on my progress.

This weekend two of my critique partners joined me for a writing retreat at the beach. I prepared for Hanna but we didn't let her stop us. I wrote 3094 words and organized the next scene.

That set me up for today. 2360 words and I finished the second part of the book. On to the third and final part of the book. Whoo Hoo.

My daily goal is 1500-2000 words and I need to write at least 5 days a week. If it continues to go like today, I might even finish early.

If you have a deadline you're trying to meet or want to set one, join me in keeping track of your progress. A little competition can spur you to even greater efforts. Having a cheering squad, is even better.

The Positive Side of Losing

2008-08-24T11:48:00.000-07:00

There are a lot of pluses about writing romance. One of them is the contests where anything from query letters to the first 5o pages of your book is judged by your peers. All the judges are trained to critique romance. Some are like me and have finished one or more novels and achieved PRO status with RWA. Some are published in romance, other fiction or nonfiction. If you final in the contest, the final judging is often done by an agent or an editor.

One of the reasons I enter contests is the hope that my work will reach the eyes of those elusive editors or agents and they will fall in love with it. Another reason I enter is to find out if my opening chapter or love scene or breakup scene works. If it engages the reader or if there are problems. You can't solve problems unless you know where they are.

Judging is subjective. That's important to remember. Not all writer's voices appeal to all readers. When I get back the score sheets and comments from a contest, I try and weed out the ones who don't like my voice. They are the ones who dislike scenes or dialogue or characters other judges like. Of course, I had to get feedback from many judges to be able to do this.

I won't lie to you. It hurts for someone to pick apart your work. It hurts even more to know that there are people who hate the way you write. But this is the real world and when your book is published there will be people who read it and don't like it. And they will let you know this. So it's good to have a layer of calluses built up before your book goes out to a greater audience.

The second thing I do is to focus on the positive comments. What do I do well? In my case, it's dialogue. And I treasure notes saying the judge hopes to see my book on the shelves because they want to buy it and read the rest of the story.

Then comes reading the notes about what doesn't work. Most judges I've gotten feedback from tell me this in a constructive manner. Some don't. Again, I try to focus on the constructive comments. Sometimes I have to put the score sheets away for a couple of days (or weeks, or months) before I can do this. Sometimes I fight it. But if several judges are saying the same thing, I have to take it seriously. I have to look at what I've written and say okay, if this doesn't work what will. How can I make it more exciting or faster paced? How can I improve? Do I really need to buy a grammar book? (Yes! And I still have trouble with commas.) Do I need to go to a workshop or take an on-line class to help me with this?

When I first sent out my baby to contests, the overwhelming feedback was that I head hopped. I had POV problems. Now, first I had to learn what the heck that meant. Then I had to learn how to correct it. In this last batch of contests, I entered I learned that the classes I've taken, the books I've read ,and the writing and rewriting I've done trying to get the perspective or point of view right have paid off. One judge said my POV was "masterful". Wow. My hard work is paying off.

Now I'm thinking about some of the other comments that have been made. Letting them percolate in my mind while I get on with the business of finishing my rewrites. Considering how I might use that feedback to improve the delivery of my story. Because I love this story and I want to do it justice.

So it's not always a bad thing not to final in a contest. You can learn a lot by looking at the positive side of negative feedback. At least, I have.

Of course there's another good thing that can come of entering contests. Making it to the final three. Placing. Winning.

Body Language

Third Place 2006 Summer Sizzle
Third Place 2006 Ignite the Flame
First Place Romantic Suspense 2008 Dixie Kane Memorial Contest
Finaled and awaiting the final judging in 2008 Toronto Romance Writers' Golden Opportunity Contest.

The Hardest Thing About Being a Parent

2008-08-15T09:27:00.000-07:00

Parenting is not an easy job. The manuals aren't complete and training in 0n-the-job and seat-of-your-pants. But the hardest thing is seeing your children hurting.

Hurting at a cut, a sting, a broken bone. Hurting at a broken toy, a messed up video game, a screwed up audition. Hurting at the loss of a friend, a pet, a girlfriend.

If I could I'd take all the hurts physical and mental and spare them the pain. But I can't. And shouldn't. Because learing to cope with and survive the small hurts gives them the strength and mechanisms to deal with the larger ones. I know this. It doesn't make it any easier.

All I can do is be there for them with a hug, an ear, advice if they ask for it. (Still waiting on that day), and love. Lots of love. And hope that they will learn that though living life to the full and risking your heart sometimes brings pain, the rewards and the joys outweigh this and you should never stop striving for the heights. Never stop loving and caring. If I can teach them this then I will have done my job right

Cherry Bombs in San Francisco

2008-08-09T13:41:00.000-07:00

K.T., OH, RSS (back), Merry, and GG after a great dinner in Chinatown.
Who knew our own Lori had a diner. Breakfast was delicious.
K.T. and OH in front of the diner. I could have sworn I took a picture of the sign too.
In the top middle is the top of the San Francisco Marriot where RWA National was held.
The gate to Chinatown where Dee, my youngest and I had just finished buying out the shops and having a nice lunch.

Not the best pictures but there they are.

One of the best things about the conference was the chance to meet my on-line friends in person and reconnect with friends I've met before.

Thanks to everyone's tips the blues fled, the submission was sent off and jet lag was a non-event. Now I need to get back into the book.

Goal. Revisions done by Sept. 15th. Final polishing done by Oct. 1st.

Post Conference Blues

2008-08-04T15:35:00.000-07:00

The energy at RWA Nationals is so strong and it is so wonderful to have 4-5 days to talk with other writers that once it's over there is a let down. No matter how much you missed your family and your own bed. No matter how excited you are about getting back to your WIP to put into practice what you have learned.

It hit me today after the red eye flight and a nap once we got home. I found myself feeling down and doubts about my ability to sell reared their very ugly heads. I wanted to talk it over with someone. I thought maybe I shouldn't send in the pages to the agent I queried. Maybe I needed to wait, to polish, to change, to avoid the chance of rejection.

Thank heavens I recognized it for what it was and made a plan. I'm so tired today that looking over my first 10 pages and working on tweaking the synopsis and writing the letter did not seem like the best use of what little energy I have. I want to be fresh. Because it's important to let your belief in your book and your passion for it shine through when you send out a partial or even a few pages.

So I thought what will free me up to concentrate on the book tomorrow? What might pull me away from it? What could I use as an excuse to avoid working on it?

The answer was the necessary chores anyone has when they return from a trip. Grocery shopping, unpacking, laundry, and in my case a car that should have been inspected by 7/31/08. So I pushed myself to do those things. Now the kids have food for the next few days and things they enjoy that don't take a lot of preparation. Clothes are unpacked, washed and drying. The car is at the shop where it will be inspected tomorrow. No I haven't sorted all my notes, papers and promotional information I gathered at the conference. But the biggies are done and I can set aside a little time each day to finish the rest. There are not suitcases sitting in the hall or mounds of laundry piled in front of the washer to drain my energy tomorrow.

The only thing that will keep me from getting the information to the agent tomorrow is myself. I will do this. I owe it to the story. The story I love and believe in. I believe in it and am so committed to sending it off that I did the stuff today that usually takes me more than a week at the least. Or a month or two. I'm the queen of procrastination.

Are you feeling the post conference blues? Even if you didn't go, are you putting up roadblocks that stop you from selling your book? From finishing it? How do you motivate yourself to burst through those roadblocks? Because if we don't destroy the roadblocks we set up we will never succeed.

Day 4 RWA--Icing on the Cake

2008-08-02T18:57:00.000-07:00

Today was good. Really good. I had breakfast with a friend, went to a workshop that was worth the entire trip and got free books. Learned a lot at publisher spotlights and a workshop on three ways to make yourself irresistible to editors and agents.

The workshop was Save The Cat given by Blake Snyder. He wrote a book of the same name. Go out and buy it now. I'm going to. Tried to buy it at the bookstore here but they were sold out. He's funny and his explanation of the pitch, the log line, and his 15 point beat sheet really gave me some light bulb moments. I can't write all my notes here. Besides his website and books will do it much better. He is also a very funny man who loves romance writers. His audience loved him right back.

This year is the first year I've gone to any of the Spotlights on publishers because the first two years I was concentrating on craft. I'd strongly recommend these spotlights to authors who have finished manuscripts but aren't sure what lines they fit. I only wish I'd gotten to more. Oh well. Next year.

I also recommend visiting www.larsenpomada.com to learn the Three Ways of Impressing Editors and Agents. It is an informative website and I really enjoyed hearing Elizabeth Pomada and Laurie McClean give the workshop.

I'm going to miss the Award Ceremony because this is my anniversary and being a romance writer I think it's good for a husband and wife to spend their anniversary out together.

I'm so glad I came to the conference and I'm looking forward to the next one in Washington D.C. next year.

Making it Through the Rocks

2008-08-02T06:55:00.000-07:00

The road (or boat trip) to publishing a book can be very rocky. What is important is not giving up even when your way is blocked or when your boat breaks up. Talent is not enough. You have to persevere.

I saw this demonstrated over and over again yesterday when I volunteered at the editor/agent sessions. We got to the rooms a half hour before the sessions were to begin and the co-ordinator started listing assignments and asking who would like to do them. When she said she needed someone to handle filling the open and cancelled appointments, I immediately volunteered. That meant I had the first shot at the appointments so I picked an agent and put my name in. Then people started coming in and the next 4 hours were insane.

I'd never realized that you could come to the waiting room for the sessions and check for a free appointment. We did it first come first serve, had people sign in and called them when we got to them. By the time the morning session ended, we had worked through 92 names. Not everyone found an editor or agent they wanted to pitch to but most of those people got a session. Some of them waited almost the entire 3 hours. They persevered, they got to pitch and I bet there will be some who get an agent or contract out of it. Not all were those like me who had procrastinated to long to get one before the conference. Many already had appts but were getting others to increase their chances to find the person who would fall in love with their book.

It was stressful, loud and exhausting but I was amazed at how nice the majority of the people were despite their long wait and the fact that I knew little about what the agents and editors on the list wanted to acquire. An angel named Karen who is President of a chapter, took pity on me and helped me with my job. I learned a lot about the various agents, editors and handling anxious writers from her. I just wish I'd caught her last name. Would I volunteer for that again? In a heartbeat. But next time I will have armed myself with a cheat sheet about the agents and editors and I will request a helper if there are enough volunteers.

Connie Brockaway spoke at the awards luncheon. She likened writers to superheros and used The Heros Journey to describe the journey of writers. Very good and very funny.

The afternoon I spent working on my pitch since I hadn't planned on doing one so no workshops. Then since I had a few more minutes I visited the agency website to learn more about the agency and the agent.

Back to the waiting room. Reading over pitch. Deep breaths. Finally my turn. Ten very long minutes of sitting at a empty table with no agent. Smiled. Said no problem when the co-ordinators apologized and said they didn't know what had happened. Left my name, cell and email as requested.

I was upset though. Getting geared up then nothing leaves an emotional backwash. Went back to the room, immediately changed out of my uber professional suit and asked DH if he wanted to go and get a glass of wine. Just before we walked out of the room my cell rang. Stephanie, the co-ordinator told me that Ms. Pomada had come in and would stay late to see me and the other writer who she had missed. Did I want it? Oh yes.

Back into suit. Back to waiting room. Joking with the volunteers I knew from the morning. When I got my time, Ms. Pomada was very nice and very apologetic. I told her that sometimes things happened we couldn't controll and I appreciated her staying to see me then I pitched. She acted very interested in my concept, the session went very well and she requested the first 10 pages and a synopsis. Just a standard request but I'm happy. And I liked her.

The writers that have impressed me the most at this conference are the ones who have a positive attitude, are appreciative even if things don't go their way and who smile. I am trying to immulate them.

So did not make it to any workshops today but I learned a lot. It was a good day and made better by getting to meet online friends and go out to dinner with them. But more aobut them later. I need to get dressed for today.

Dream Big Write Big

2008-07-31T22:39:00.001-07:00

Blogger ate the last post. Let's try again.

In the Pro Retreat today, Linda Howard said she practiced 20 years before she sold her first book and she still doesn't know how to write a synopsis.

Rules are good when you're starting out and learning but then you need to throw them out the window and write your way.

Write the book you are passionate about even if it doesn't fit into any slot. No one else can write the book you're passionate about. She had an idea that just wouldn't go away though she was told it wouldn't sell. That idea became Son of the Morning.

There is no such thing as too sexy, too far out or too fantastic. You are cheating yourself if you don't write the book you passionately believe in.

Another speaker (didn't catch her name) said that success comes if you keep your hope and believe in yourself. Being sedentary is the death of creativity. If you believe it, it will happen. You will be published.

There was an agent's panel consisting of Laura Bradford of the Bradford Literary Agency, laurie McLean of Pomada-Larsen Agency, Nathan Bransford of Curtis Brown Ltd, Barbara Poelle of Irene Goodman and Jennifer Shober of Spencerhill. They are all actively acquiring. They flew through the types of books they want so fast I couldn't get them all done. Check the Agency websites for that and for what they want.

Dream Big Write Big

2008-07-31T22:02:00.000-07:00

That's what Linda Howard said in the Pro Retreat this afternoon. She also said she practiced 20 years

Glorious Day 2

2008-07-30T22:43:00.001-07:00

Today my guys and I headed for the Pacific. The picture is taken from the walk along the cliffs in Sutro Park or maybe it was called Sutro Walk. It was a stupendous place to hike and the only reason we went up there was a man at the bus stop recommended it. We saw the ocean side of the Golden Gate Bridge. Fog had rolled in and shrouded the top of the bridge and the opposite shore.
After walking up to the memorial for the USS San Francisco which was lost at the battle for Guadalcanal, we headed down the lower coastal path. It was posted.

So of course my boys went as close as possible without stepping over the safety wires. See the opening in the cliff? That's a tunnel under it. When you walk through you hear the waves booming against the wall to your side. It's amazing.

We walked from the top of the cliff in the picture above to the bottom and back up the other side. Then we had lunch in the Bistro at Cliff House where from our table we could watch wetsuit clad surfers waiting for the perfect wave, a pod of dolphins swimming by and sea birds on the rocks. The food was fantastic too.

Then we went to the Zoo. Lots of walking but a great day. I enjoyed going places with my boys when they were little. Today showed me how wonderful it is doing things with them when we can relate as people instead of parent and children. They are amazing.

Another time I'll tell you about our bus ride with the boys from the 'hood and share the shots I took of the flamings which made me think of the Cherry Bombs but I promised to say something about the conversations I had last night. Topics of discussion included how great it is to be with people who nod and completely understand when you talk about the characters in your head digging in their heels and refusing to go where you think they should go and waking up in the night to write down an idea and not stopping 'til the alarm goes off the next morning.

People are so nice. Two women fell into step with me while I was going back to registration yesterday and we were chatting. When I realized one of them was Linda Howard, I gathered my courage, told her how much I enjoyed her books and what great things I was hearing about her latest book. She said she'd been very nervous because it was different from her other books. Wow. She gets nervous too. Once her friend had registered and put on her name tag I realized she was Beverly Barton. Nice people.

After returning to the hotel, the guys relaxed in the room while I went down to the Literacy Signing. For those who haven't ever been, at every RWA National Convention publishers donate books and authors sign them and all the proceeds of the sales go to the local literacy fund. Walking into the expansive ballroom you are hit by a wall of noise and dazed by the masses of people--mostly women--and the tables of books. It can be overwhelming. I know it was for me my first year. I walked around with my hands behind my back and didn't buy a thing.

Not so last year or today. I searched out some of the authors whose books I'd bought for the first time at the conference last year and whose work I had enjoyed: Melissa Mayhue has two more books in her Daughters of the Glen series; Linnea Sinclair who writes science fiction romance. I bought the new books of some favorite authors: Hope Tarr, Elaine Fox and Kristan Higgins and Saskia Walker. And I continued the tradition I started last year of picking up some books by authors that were new to me. Enjoyed talking with the authors and the people in line waiting to pay for the books.

To round out a perfect day, I got a call from my friend Dee who asked me if I wanted to go to dinner with her. We had a delicous meal of Coastal Mexican food in a restaurant in a mall a few blocks from the hotel and I loved getting a chance to catch up with her and just talk.

The workshops start tomorrow. Haven't caught up with some other friends who are coming to the meeting. Hope to see them tomorrow. Well I have too. We've planned to sit together at lunch.

I Am Here In San Francisco

2008-07-29T21:35:00.000-07:00

Yes, I am in San Francisco for the Romance Writers of America National Conference. And I am wired. On line but also excited, excited, excited. Less than 12 hours here and already I'm motivated and inspired.

We got up at 4am Eastern Standard and have been going strong--at least I have--ever since. And of course I had trouble getting to sleep last night because of pre-conference anxiety. Did I pack everything I'll need, is everything set at home for the pet sitter? Did the kids pack everything they will need? I maybe got 4 hours of sleep. I barely remember getting up and dressed. In fact in the Charlotte Airport between connections, I went in the restroom, looked in the mirror and thought "Wow, I'm wearing a necklace. When did I put that on?"

I spent the first flight (not long enough to pull out the computer and start writing) and the time between flights doing the in-flight magazine crosswords. Then I had to try the Sudukos. Besides there was the movie (Nim's Island--enjoyed it) and the meal. Then I had no excuse. I needed to at least try and work on my revisions. And I wrote more than 1000 words. I had insight into the scene. I knew where I was going next. It felt so good since I've spent the last week cleaning house, getting errands done, packing and NOT WRITING.

Then we get to SF. BTW my DH and 3 boys came with me this year. An experiment. DH's brother lives out here and it's been 7 or 8 years since we were last out so I talked them into it. Wasn't sure how it would work. I'm here to learn, see old friends, make new ones, network. But my family is here too and I want to spend some time sightseeing with them. I've balanced it. I had DH schedule us in early in case I went to the Leadership conference on Wed. but I decided not to do that. I'm a poor leader and not going to run for any other offices in my chapter in the foreseeable future. And to be honest, though it was interesting and stimulating last year I did not have much to bring back. Our chapter pres. attended last year too and I think she got more out of it. It's just not my strength.

So today and tomorrow were for my DH and boys then the conference and then Sun we have time to do some more sightseeing together before we take the redeye home.

We get in, get the luggage, DH calls the car service and we go out to wait. He's all concerned because they said they were sending a Lincoln Town Car and he thought the 5 of us and our (mostly my) luggage wouldn't fit. I'm in conference mode. We're here. It's all good. So maybe we'll be squished but we'll get to the hotel and so what we'll survive.

What drives up? A black stretch limo. I think that made DH19's trip right there. Mr. Laid Back is taking photo's with his cell phone. And I felt like a published author with a readership. It felt--good. And it helped send my self doubts right out the window. It was my first trip in a limo too. DS13 was blase. He rode in a limo after meeting a selling goal for magazines in middle school.

At the hotel, the rooms weren't ready but I was watching the people come through the lobby and check-in and I RECOGNIZED PEOPLE. Some had done workshops I had attended. Some were familiar faces from the other conferences I attended. It felt good.

Another thing that felt good was being the one who was here on business. All our other trips have been tied to business DH was on. I was the one who took the kids around to see the sights while he was in meetings. And I loved it and am so happy we have had the opportunities. But to have the kids see me as a professional means a lot more than I ever expected. I don't know if it makes a difference to them but it does to me. And I see it as a start. This may be the first time but it won't be the last. My confidence is rising with every minute and I haven't even attended the first workshop.

It was a bit off putting because all my guys were wiped out and couldn't drum up interest in going out and about today. I was wired. It surprised them. When I told them I spent all of every conference I went to like this, DH told the boys he might have to room with them to get some sleep.

So we went to eat then got into our rooms, DS17 fell asleep. DS19 vegged out on the bed, texted his girlfriend and went on-line and DH begged for a little time to recharge his batteries. So I took DS13 swimming. Note: If you go to a conference with a bunch of women and you think no I won't take my swimming suit because I don't look the way I want--forget it. Everyone else is thinking the same thing and the pool is empty. So is the spa and the one here is almost big enough to swim laps. After spending almost 12 hours either on a plane or in an airport, stretching my muscles by swimming and then soothing them in the spa felt glorious. Take your suit and go to the pool.

After our swim and a shower, I took DS13 to the consierge lounge to check out the horrie doevers. I saw a friend from Australia that I'd met in the CL at my first conference in Atlanta. When DS13 went back to the room, she invited me into her group and I spent the next hour and a half talking with writers. Not big name published writers but writers of differing levels of experience, some in their 10th conference, some in their first and it was great as it always is. What I have found is that romance writers are welcoming, supportive and a whole lot of fun.

Check in tomorrow to hear what we talked about and more about the City on the Bay and the Nationals. And the wonderful and wise words of a reader friend that express exactly what it feels like to put your heart on the page and send it out into the world.

Okay, I've been awake for more than 21 hours. If I'm going to be functional tomorrow I better try and get some sleep.

My Garden

2008-04-20T06:58:00.000-07:00

Below: Mahonia

These are just a few of the flowers blooming in my yard right now. The pollen from the trees is coating the porch and the cars but the flowers are beautiful and make me smile whenever I walk by them or look out the window.

Left: White lilacs

Below: Can't remember the name but love the tiny blue flowers.

Left above: Purple lilacs with our house in the background

Above: Candytuft

Left: Purple lilacs and butterfly

Below.White azaleas

Le Left: azaleas

Below: Spring Phlox

Just wanted to share some of my flowers with you. There are more. Stay tuned.

Synopsis Blues and Bubble Baths

2008-04-03T14:02:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, my critique group met. I think I may have mentioned what a great group this is. Constructive not destructive. Supportive and fun. All the pacing and agonizing over the chapter I mentioned in the last post was worth it. That's the one I read yesterday. In Panera's. Thank God I'm not to the sex scenes yet. Towards the end of lunch (we usually meet at one of the members homes then go out to lunch but she's out of town which is why we ended up reading at Panera's) I asked if any of them would be interested in going on a tour of the Naval Amphibious Base with me if I ever got up enough nerve to schedule it. The answer was yes but the question was why did it take nerve.

I thought about this all the way home. The hero of this book is a Navy SEAL. I love Suzanne Brockmann and it is through her books that I first became enamoured of the SEALs. But I do not want to imitate her and could not even if I wanted to. And I'm embarrassed because who am I to write about SEALs. I don't even know any though I've done a lot of research and reading. So I avoid telling people that my hero is a SEAL. And I've tried to change his profession. But my characters just fold their arms and say "Too bad lady, that's who we are." My books don't have the missions and military action of Suz Brockmann's though there is some. There's definitely action but most of it takes place at home not in the field.

Today, I found the number for the Public Affairs office of the Naval Base on the Internet and made myself call them. Turns out they don't do individual tours only group. I told the woman I spoke with that I was a writer and she said she'd get her PAO (Public Affairs Officer) to call me and about an hour later he did.

He wanted to know why I wanted a tour and what I was writing and I told him my hero was a SEAL, my heroine the orphaned daughter of a SEAL and that some of the scenes took place on base. I explained that what I was looking for was familiarity so I didn't say something so totally absurd that anyone familiar with the Navy or the base would throw the book against the wall in disgust.

So what does this have to do with synopses you ask. Well, the PAO asked me send him an email telling him what the book was about and why I needed to see the base. He has to show that to his bosses before it could even be considered. National Security you know.

One of my goals (last month but I didn't do it so now it's a goal for this month) is to write a synopsis because I want to enter some more contests. So now I have two reasons. I opened all the synopses of this book that I'd written before and read through them. After I finished getting sick, I started over. And froze.

If I can write a 100,000 + word book, why is it so hard to write a 250-500 word summary?

I have read some great articles and books on writing a synopsis. I've gone to workshops. It hasn't helped. I get too involved in the minutia of the book. I can't remember my initial premise. I'm not sure whether I had one.

I pulled out a timeline and some notes I'd done last year after the RWA and read through them and it is helping crystallize the characters' motivations, their goals. It also helped pinpoint some major problems in the second part of the book. The part I'm going to start working on by next Monday. What do I do when I have a major problem like that? I take a bubble bath. Bubble baths are wonderful places for thinking.

Guess what one of the major problems with the Part Two is? None of it should take place on the base. I've got a totally new opening scene that brings in one of the important secondary characters and highlights Mike's motivation. I'm really excited. But now I don't need a tour.

Do you think I'll get put on some Homeland Security watchlist if I don't follow up with the PAO?

Rewrites

2008-03-20T18:15:00.000-07:00

Rewrites are tough. I've probably said that before but it was more than a year ago so who remembers.

I'm back to working on the book that I did the exert from last year. Body Language. I'm determined to finish reworking it so I can start sending it out. Again. But better. I hope. No I know it is better. I have learned a lot since I finished the manuscript two years ago.

It's been hard going getting back into the swing of writing. It is so much easier to lose myself in someone else's published book. And once I lose myself, it is hard to find that trail of bread crumbs. So I'm trying to limit myself to reading in the evenings before I go to sleep.

I've started keeping track of how many words a day I am writing because I'm going to be taking part in a writing challenge come April. I've been frustrated because it's been coming slow. I had planned to set a goal of 1670 words a day. Backed it down to 1000 so I could achieve it and found it a struggle to get 500.

Yesterday, I had my critique group then the kids dentist appointment and struggled to get in a few hundred words. I was close to the end of the chapter I was revising but just couldn't manage to complete it. Finally turned off the computer in disgust at 10 pm.

Today, I wrote. Deleted. Wrote. Walked around the house. Wrote. Read it aloud. Deleted. Fed the cats. The lizard. The dogs. Wrote.

You get the picture. This afternoon I finally finished the chapter. I celebrated with chocolate peanut butter ice cream. Then I started on the next chapter.

Now this chapter is being totally changed from the original. My book has three parts. The first begins in the heroine's point of view for the first chapter, switches to the hero's for the next four and in the other rewrites I had the last chapter in this section in the hero's POV. (The first draft of the book was in a zillion POV's because I head hopped all over creation. Didn't even know what head hopping was at that point.) I decided to switch back to the heroine's POV for this chapter. Why? Symmetry and because she needs to be heard, to become more three dimentional.

I'm over 700 words into this chapter and am really excited about the way it is going.

That's right over 700 words. Total today (saved words, all the deleted ones don't count) 1671 words. I couldn't believe it when I added it up.

Tomorrow may be a bust. I may struggle to do 200 words. I have to pack for the beach, clean at least a layer of dust off the house, run errands and drive down to the beach when the kids get out of school. That's okay because I am going to put in at least two solid hours of writing before I start all the other stuff and maybe once we're settled tomorrow night I can do some more.

Doesn't matter. I have a goal and I'm working towards it.

I'd happy dance but I'm too tired.

My Voice

2008-03-18T06:47:00.000-07:00

AHHHchoooo. waves hand in air My goodness, I didn't realize how dusty this place would get when I left it for almost a year. Well, I'm back now and as soon as I clean up I'll post. Long pause.

On second thought, I hate to clean so instead I'm hanging a few packages of dust masks on the hook by the door. Yes that's the one. If you'd like to visit, just pop one on and pull up a chair. Um, no not that one. The leg's broken. I guess I need to do more than dust. Later.

Since I was here last, I was invited to join a local critique group. Each time we meet, we read a chapter of our WIP then get feedback. All 5 of us have vastly different styles which actually makes the feedback more helpful. But it is also a learning experience. I'm not very comfortable giving the feedback to others. First, I know how hard it is to write. Second, we all have different styles and distinct voices. It's important to not try and rewrite their words into my voice. So I am taking babysteps with the feedback. Listen. Say what I like about the chapter. Identify any spot where I'm confused about what is going on. Listen to the other feedback. That is as helpful as hearing feedback on my own writing.

I've heard that critique groups can be nasty. Mine isn't. They are constructive and knowlegable. They have been writing much longer than I have. And they love my voice.

Wow.

When I first started learning about craft, that was my biggest fear. What the hell is a voice, I asked myself and what if I don't have one. Then I learned that anyone who writes anything subjective has a voice--a style and personality to their writing. I began looking for and identifying the things in books I loved--or hated, the things that made up the author's unique style. But still there is the fear. That is why it is so important to risk others reading your precious creation. It's hard. You risk rejection. But having someone say they loved what you have written; having them encourage you to keep writing, to fix the rough spots or toss out the excess weight but to keep on writing. It's like winning an Academy award. It's like the moment when you hold your brand new baby in your arms and feel the love expanding your chest until you think you will surely explode.

So thank you. You know who you are. You who told me I had a gift for storytelling and to finish the damn book. You who came before the critique group. All of you keep me hoping. Keep me writing. Thank you.

Damn dust. It's making my eyes water.

A Teaser from my book

2007-02-24T11:44:00.000-08:00

The breeze rippled the green-brown water as the sailboat glided out of the creek. Sunlight flashed across its surface like the laughter of a child—bright and pure. The last knot of control she had so carefully tied around her memories and emotions loosened. She closed her eyes and tilted her head back to catch the light and the heat and let a few—just a few—escape.

The kiss of waves splashing over her toes as she ran down an endless stretch of beach; the shift of wet sand under her feet; the coconut smell of suntan lotion on hot skin. A squeal from behind and she glanced over her shoulder at the grinning boy chasing after her and the couple following hand and hand. She could run ahead, satisfy her curiosity, dive into new experiences because they were there; would always be there for her when she returned. Love, belonging, safety, happiness. The emotions that had defined her life. So important. So quickly lost.

“A sense of homecoming.” She opened her eyes at the soft words and looked at the man sitting beside her. The man who had filled part of the hole in her heart. “I feel it as soon as I’m on or in the water.” He laughed. “Born and bred in the mountains of Kentucky but the sea is where I feel most at home. Strange isn’t it.”

“Not so strange. Life began in the sea and it runs through us with every beat of our heart.” She leaned back against the arm he’d wrapped around her waist and rested her head on his shoulder. He wouldn’t know—couldn’t know how out of character that was. “Thank you.”

“For what?” He glanced down. She reached up and traced his arched brow with a fingertip and he smiled.

“For bringing me home.”

Soaked, Cold and Laughing

2007-02-08T09:44:00.000-08:00

I thank God that I have the ability to see humor in what has been happening to us over the past year. Laughing is so much better than crying.

We are having very cold temperatures as is much of the country. The contractor had said they might be using space heaters to warm up the house since there is a delay in turning on the heat. Yesterday afternoon after I dropped DS 15 off at a friend's,I ran by the house to make sure they weren't leaving them on while no one is there. The last thing we need is another fire.

Opened the house. No space heaters, no heat, no workers. The same as it has been all week. But as I walked back to the kitchen I heard a roaring sound from the basement. I looked down the stairs but it's black dark down there with no electricity so I went back to the car to get a flashlight, tripped and toppled to the ground. Luckily I've had years of clumsiness to teach me how to fall and I wasn't hurt. Back in the house I shone the light down the steps and saw water. Water spraying onto the construction rubble coating the steps. Water covering the floor. A pipe had burst. In a house without the plumbing connected so the water is supposed to be off.

A quick call to my DH to refresh my memory on where the cutoff valve is then I inched down the steps keeping him on the phone in case I fell--which I did but only a couple of steps and I landed on a well-padded part of my body so no problem. Found the valve which the plumber had moved a bit, turned off the water. Meanwhile DH called the contractor to tell him. I didn't hang around to check the damage. My shoes, coat and pants were soaked and it was damn cold in a house that hasn't been heated in 10 months.

First fire, then flood. I laughed all the way to the shop to buy crickets for the lizards. Should have been checking for locusts. I think that's what comes next. Or maybe a plague of frogs.

I'm going to write all this down. It can use it in a murder mystery. The victim--a contractor. The suspects--all the people whose houses he's remodeling. I see it as the Money Pit meets Murder on the Orient Express.

Psychiatrist to patient: "Any suicidal thoughts?"

Patient: "No."

Psychiatrist: "Homicidal thoughts?"

Patient: "No." A long pause. "Well only about my builder."

I'm Baa-ack

2007-02-06T10:57:00.000-08:00

I hate not having access to internet where we are living. I've had bronchitis and as soon as that cleared I went into asthmatic bronchitis. So I've been holed up in bed when I wasn't out doing the things that had to be done like grocery shopping, ferrying kids around and buying appliances for the house. I have this at least once a year and my doc treats it immediately instead of futzing around saying maybe it's a virus so now I'm well and planning on staying that way.

We are still not in our house though there has been progress. They finished putting up drywall yesterday and the electrician is supposed to be hooking up the heat today so they can warm up the house so they can tape and mud. DH and I are extremely frustrated with the contractor who would probably stretch this on until April. We've informed him we need to get out of the place where we are living by the end of the month and hope that will spur them to finish. We aren't telling him that we can probably stay another month if necessary.

It's been ten months since the fire. We are all ready to go home. Home where the water pressure doesn't drop to nothing 5 or 6 times a day. Where the downstairs isn't 45 degrees while the upstairs is 75. Where we can have our cats and dogs with us. Where we have Internet access. In fact, we've learned we can get broadband there now. Home where the boys each have their own room. Where I can take a long bubble bath. Home where our hearts and spirits belong as much as our bodies.

We've spent several hours working on the yard the last two weekends clearing the accumulated junk while the dumpster is there. This weekend we plan to tackle the shed because we have to clear space to store the furniture we won't be using in the house. Some of it we are storing until the boys move out and we have more room. Some to refinish in the future. Some for a big yard sale when the weather is warmer. And some because DH and I can't agree on what to do with it.

I'll try and post before and after photos when we have an after.

Now I've caught up on emails, the Crusie and Mayer writing course, and my friends blogs. After I pick up the kids I'm going to get back to my rewrites. I'm itching to write, itching.

Never post when short of sleep

2006-12-30T15:12:00.000-08:00

Yesterday's post was supposed to be a reflection of the past year. Instead I ended up rehashing 2005. Luckily, I split it into two posts and actually reread the second and decided not to post it. Or not without edits.

In case anyone who drops by this blog and reels in horror, I post to clarify thoughts in my mind or try to put what is going on in my life/writing in perspective. And I meander. Not aimlessly but I cover twenty miles to get to my destination that turns out to have been around the corner. But until I follow the twisty path through my mind, I don't realize what that destination was.

Sort of like writing. Or the way I write. I know where I'm starting and where I want to end up. And I know my traveling companions, or think I do. On the journey we become better acquainted, change and hopefully grow. And the amazing thing I've learned is that the trip is what is important not the destination. The journey is fun, demanding, agonizing, enthralling and once it's done I'm eager to map out the next.

How did I come to write a book?

2006-12-29T18:07:00.000-08:00

New Year's Eve has never been a big holiday in our family. Back when I was a teenager, my folks used to have a party: extended family and the old friends who are like a part of your family.When I think about those parties, I remember only laughter and love. Good memories. Then my parents got older as did their friends and family and no one wanted to be on the road on New Year's Eve.

Most years my husband and I have stayed home. We get all kinds of snack and finger foods. For years we set them out on the low table where the rest of the year the kids played with their Brio trains. The kids looked forward to our special family party. Just the five of us. It's our tradition. Mommy usually falls asleep before midnight because seeing the New Year in really isn't a priority. As far as I'm concerned every morning is the start of a new year where you can start again fresh. Hey I came of age in the seventies. Every day is the start of the rest of your life. It's a cliche now but that doesn't make it wrong.

Sure on New Year's Eve I reflected on what happened over the past year and what I wanted for the next. I used to make resolutions but I'm no better at keeping them than anyone else so I gave that up. I don't remember any specific thoughts I had last New Year's Eve. I know I was thankful to be well because I'd been ill most of the fall. And I was looking forward to finishing my first book. Because 2005 was the year I started writing.

I hadn't resolved on Dec. 31st of 2004 that I would write the novel I'd always wanted to write. I'd put away the desire to write years before because I wasn't disciplined enough, talented enough, motivated enough. But whenever I finished reading a story I enjoyed, there was this wish deep in my heart. A wish that I could write a book that would move someone to laugh or that would help them escape for a little while the stresses of everyday life. But I wouldn't. I was fifty years old and you don't start writing at fifty.

Dec. 31st 2004 I hoped to make a career of selling jewelry at home shows. I was determined that I was going to succeed at that. It was the last in a line of part-time careers I'd thrown myself into. Jobs I could do and still be home with the kids when they needed me. I'd thrown myself into them. Consultant dietitian for doctor's offices, day cares, restaurant supply companies. Home organizer for the organizationally empaired. That was another career start. Antique dealer. That was an expensive one.

2005 was the year I decided to let my registration as a dietitian lapse. I had a bunch of continuing education credits I needed to earn before May because as usual I'd waited until the last minute. But I didn't want to be a dietitian any more. I didn't want to do it. This was a hard decision because I'd spent years studying and working in the field before my kids were born and sporadically after. And I'd been good at it. But that part of my life was done. Even if the jewelry didn't pan out, I didn't want to go back. And when I didn't earn my credits and pay my money, I felt guilty but it was the right decision. And each day that passed made me more sure.

The jewelry thing wasn't taking off like I'd hoped but September-December were the big sales months and I had built up a small list of hostesses and I planned to beat the bushes for more.

When the kids started back to school, I was reading and rereading Suzanne Brockmann's old books. I love her books and her characters. I suffer from insomnia and making up stories until I fell asleep had been something I'd done since I was a kid. I used to make up long ongoing stories but the ability to do that disappeared somewhere between child two and child three so I'd do like many avid readers do and think about what happened after the book I'd just been reading ended. Or make up a story for one of the secondary characters.

Suz Brockmann wasn't the only one I was reading. I was devouring all Lynn Kincaid's historical/paranormal/timetravel books because they're fun. And others. Lots of others. Mostly romances for some reason. For years, I'd read mostly mysteries and thrillers along with some romance and science fiction except for some favorite authors like Nora Roberts and Suz Brockmann. But 2005 was the year I dove back into romance, finding new (to me) authors like Linda Howard, Sharon Sala, Julie Garwood and many others.

But I did enjoy the SEALs. It was the team concept and the close ties that spoke to me. Pushing your self to the limit and beyond. Not giving up. Not only enduring but succeeding. And one night I thought what if there was a girl. The daughter of a SEAL brought up in the tight community of her dad's team. A girl who understood sacrifice and never giving up. The children of people in exciting professions often want to do the same thing. At least when they are small. But women can not be SEALs. I couldn't get this girl out of my head. And I couldn't get her story out of my head.

Most stories I'd made up over the years as I waited for sleep had disappeared once I knew what was going to happen. I lost interest when I knew the end. But this girl, and she was a girl, a teenager when the story began. She wouldn't leave. And neither would the guys she met when she was running for her life.

I didn't want to go to sleep. I wanted to keep thinking about the story. Who were the guys? Why was she running? Where was her father and what had happened to his team? And what would happen if she ran into this guy, a guy who'd helped her when she was a teenager years later. But he didn't know who she was and she couldn't tell him. Why?

I had another way to get rid of the stories in my mind. Try to write them down. Pick up a pen, sit down at the typewriter or now a computer and write Chapter One. It always worked. I'd never gotten to Chapter Two. Most of the time I didn't reach the end of page one. So one day after the kids got on the bus I sat down and typed Chapter One.

Thursday

2006-12-21T18:08:00.000-08:00

I am a
Canna

What Flower
Are You?

This is the flower I'm supposed to be. I like what it means but I have none in my garden. Interesting.

Well the cats, dogs, two sons and I are at the river. Hopefully my DH and other son will come down tomorrow and we'll get a couple of days together. Wrestling season means practices even during Christmas break. And girlfriend home from college means who wants to be with family.

On the positive side, my Christmas shopping is done and wrapped. But DH likes to do the shopping for the kids. And I let him. I'll help him wrap though.

I haven't been writing. I am using Christmas prep as an excuse but the truth is that I'm afraid to go back to rewriting. After all if I don't rewrite it, it can't get rejected. Can't get accepted either.

I've done the shopping, most of the wrapping, put together a gingerbread house and tree with my youngest (Premade kit but this is the first year we've actually made the kit I bought), mailed Christmas cards, finalized cabinets, plumbing, electric fixtures, floors, paint. Started loan process. Decorated(sparingly) the rented place. The only things I have left to do are clean and decorate this house, make cookies, pumpkin pie, wrap a couple of things. Procrastinating writing has done wonders for helping me get everything else done.

Tomorrow, I plan to start rewriting again. Goal five hours writing a day except for Christmas. No cruising the 'net, email, reading until I do that.

I am so damn scared of failing.

Back to the Future came on the other night and I watched it with DH and my youngest. Funny, putting yourself out there, risking rejection is what that movie is about. I never realized it before.

The results from the contest I entered my second book in came back this week. It got the next to the lowest score.

I will do the rewrites but screw the contests.

Point of View

2006-12-14T10:05:00.000-08:00

First thank you Dee for the NaNo banner. I'm going to copy it here when I have a longer period with Internet. Hopefully next week.

I've put my Nano Book, affectionately known as George's story, on hold while I do rewrites on the book I pitched in New Jersey. An editor said she'd be interested in seeing it again if I rewrote it. She also mentioned some areas where it needed work. I was going to wait until January and until after I finished G's book but my CherryBomb friends McB and Dee advised me to get right on it since the editor had expressed interest. They were as usual correct.

So last week I printed out the version I'd sent to the editor. I saw exactly what she and McB (who read it for me) had pointed out as problems. Point of View is a biggie as is description. So last week I labored over the first part of the book. And had a marvelous idea and made changes, worked on POV and description of the setting. Then I printed it back off Sunday night, and gave it to my DH to read. I assured him that there wasn't any romance in that part and begged for feedback. He actually read through it and identified some areas that were confusing, some typos and grammer issues but on the whole liked it.

But I reread it while he was. And the POV isn't right. Everytime I rewrite the thing it gets worse not better. At least that was my feelings that night. I hoped it was because I was tired and frazzled. But every time I started looking at it on Monday and Tuesday, I felt sick and discouraged. Not that I got much time to look at it. Monday, I spent all day at the house fretting over what had and hadn't been done while I waited for FedEx to deliver the check from the mortgage company that had to then be delivered to the builder. And I obsessed over where the furniture would go when we moved back in and whether the changes we'd had them make in the house were good ones. Tuesday, I had an appointment to get my mop of hair cut and colored and then had to run the kids around. But I could have made time to write. In fact, I did write some Tuesday afternoon while I was waiting to pick up the kids from school.

I tried writing the first scene from the first person POV and then switched it. That was a suggestion in one of the craft books I'd been reading over the last week. Which one escapes me at the momen. And it started clicking. Unfortunately, I haven't had a chance to write since then. Little things like supervising my youngest do his homework. I found out Monday afternoon that he hasn't been turning in or completing the assignments I thought he had done. Taking my middle son to work out and for his bass lesson. Applying for loans. Drs appointments. Running the check to the contractor and spending an hour and a half discussing the house with him. Appointment at the bank about money for said house. The youngest's string concert which conflicted with the oldest's wrestling so I didn't get to see him wrestle. And win. Then today I had to come down to the cottage to take care of the cats for the week, pay bills and collect the info we have filed here that the bank needs. And of course the Christmas shopping, wrapping, decorating (bare minimal this year).

This sounds like a pity party but it isn't. Except for the house stuff, it's what mom's and dad's always have to balance. If I was trying to work a full time or even a part time (paying) job right now, I'd be insane. And probably fired. And this brings me right back to POV. From my POV, I'm peddling as fast as I can and frustrated that I don't have more time available to write. And I thought about my friends who are balancing family, house, jobs, church and volunteer work and trying to write. They're peddling as fast as they can and frustrated at the lack of time to write.
But we are squeezing it in where and when we can. Yes we may have to take a break for the holidays or a deadline at work or a family member's illness or a house remodel. And every single one of us is pinched and pulled.

Realizing this helped me take a deep breath and relax. Looking at things from a different POV helped me put what I have to/want to/hope to do in perspective. I don't have to have this book revised before the end of the month. What I do have to do is try and get the revisions right. And that's going to take time. Maybe I won't get it right now. Maybe when I finish the revisions and submit the book again, the editor will say nope not what I'm looking for or that it still needs major work. Rushing and agonizing between now and Dec. 30th won't guarantee, she'll like it or want it or offer for it. That's reality. Reality is that I may never sell this book. Reality is that all the reworking I've done on it over the past eight months has lowered the scores I've gotten in contests. Reality is I may not know enough about the craft of writing to do this story justice at this point in time.

So what should I do? Give up? No. I won't. I'll rewrite it and resubmit it. Because I love the story. Because having an editor express interest in seeing a rewrite is not something that happens every day. Especially with a first book. If I give up now, I am letting down my characters, my story and myself. It would be so easy to give up. If I've learned anything in the past year, it's that writing is damn hard work. Writing well is even harder. Kind of like raising children or keeping a marriage healthy and happy.

So here's the plan. I'm going to squeeze out time to rewrite. It will be done when it's done. It will be as good as I can make it and I'll send it back off. Then I'll use what I've learned to rewrite the second book in the series. And I'll keep on going to workshops and talks and reading craft books.

I may never sell these two books. That's reality. If I put them aside and move on to something new, I certainly won't sell them. If I'm ever to succeed as a writer, I have to put my work out there and try to sell it. I have to accept the rejections and the critisism, work on improving the books, send them off and then move on to the next one. That's you George. I'm going to get back to you but Mike and Joey need my attention first.

I screwed up

2006-12-08T10:16:00.000-08:00

I evidently didn't download my Nano correctly because didn't get a winner's banner to post here. Or I waited too late.

Oh well, I know I did it.

Resting?

2006-11-26T11:45:00.000-08:00

I haven't written any more of George's book this weekend though I've read two excellent books on craft. James Frey's How to Write a Damn Good Novel II and Michael Seidman's Fiction The Art and Craft of Writing and Getting Published. They will help when I begin my revisions and hopefully help me complete this book so that I avoid some of the mistakes I've been making. I'd recomment Fiction to every beginning writer. I'm going to buy both these books and Frey's How to Write a Damn Good Novel for my library because I'm going to be referring to them and using the exercises Seidman provided.

This weekend has been spent with family and researchiung things for the house. The family part because I wanted to and the research because we have to. I plan to resume writing tomorrow am if not this evening.

I'm watching several auctions on light fixtures on ebay because the electrician threw out the ones we'd told him and the contractor that we wanted to save. I'm planning to send them a bill for the replacements and to notify the insurance company so they will not reimburse them for those lights. That makes three lovely original lights they have thrown out against our wishes.
I also need to write a letter about the problems we are having with the contractor and send it to the regulatory agencies since the owner is ignoring our requests to talk to him about the problems.

It's a beautiful day, we've all finally relaxed and it's time to go back. Isn't that always the way.

50,050

2006-11-22T18:47:00.000-08:00

But I'm not going to stop. The book's not done yet.

The Premise

2006-11-22T15:55:00.000-08:00

Last night I was reading Frey's How to Write a Damn Good Novel. He was talking about how important it was to know your premise. Which worried me. Because I realized that I didn't know what the premise of my current book is. Or the other two.

This means the stories kind of meander around and there are scenes that don't feel right. There's something wrong with them but I can't put my finger on it to fix them. Then last night as I was reading I had a lightbulb moment. I can't fix them because I don't know their purpose and that's because I don't have a clear premise.

I've been going to workshops and listening to speakers and reading How To Write books but when they start talking about every scene having to have a conflict and a resolution that leads to the big black moment in the book and the final resolution I start mentally stuttering. And worrying. Because I know I'm not building the scenes up the way I want to or making the point of the book clearly. I can't verbalize or write it because I'm not sure what it is.

It's like I'm driving somewhere. I know where I want to end up. I get there but I can't give you directions that make sense and I can't explain how or why I arrived at my destination.

I'm not sure that makes sense either.

But just a few minutes ago, I had some insight into the central character in my book. So I started a new document and wrote it down. Then I wrote down the motivations for two of the other main characters. (I wrote down something for the fourth too but his motivation and goal needs work. )

And suddenly I understood the premise for this book. And wrote it down.

We are haunted by fears that destroy our lives. Or more succinctly. Fears destroy lives. Then I turned it around. Acknowledging your fears allows you to conquer them and find happiness and peace.

Yes I know I'm switching from first person to third to second. The POV lightbulb hasn't gone off yet.

That's okay. It will.

Almost 50,000 words into the book and I just figured out the premise. But that should make the second half of the book easier to write. And help me revise the first half. After NaNoWri

Thanks to Deb Dixon, Jenny Crusie, Bob Mayer, J. Frey and all the other writers who share their knowledge in person and in print I'm learning the craft of writing. In spite of my fears and mental blocks.

Playing on the Internet

2006-11-22T05:49:00.000-08:00

I'm here at the cottage, just me and the dogs and cats. Perfect time to write with very few distractions. Except here I have the internet. And it's a chance to catch up with friends and their blogs, with HeWroteSheWrote, with my romance writers chapter loop. So when I got her last night, I didn't write. And so far this morning I've been playing.

Setting my goal. I have to write for 2.5 hours before I check the Internet again. I'm going to get at least 5 hours of writing in before my family descends on me. I wish I could say that I'd make my 50,000 words today but I'm struggling a bit with the story. I need to go back and revise and edit but not until after Nov. 30. And I probably should wait until I finish the book, walk away and work on something else then come back to it. But first I have to finish it.

So off the Internet for several hours. I need to get dressed and walk the dogs first. I hope none of us get blown away.

Now I'm tempted to write down the funny things that happened yesterday when I picked up all four dogs by myself and drove them here. But that would be playing and I am going to work.

Passed 45,000

2006-11-20T13:39:00.000-08:00

Just uploaded my novel and officially have 45,701 words. Whoopee.

Got to get back to the book.

The Weekends Over Already?

2006-11-19T13:46:00.000-08:00

I can't believe it is Sunday afternoon already. I didn't do as much writing as I had planned. I got sidetracked yesterday trying to do research for the book on line. I need to take a class. I spend hours finding nothing. Or I find it, lose it and can never get there again.

I wrote 4040 words yesterday though. That brings me up to about 42,000. I'm going to make 50,000 words. I'm so excited.

What amazes me though is that except for the first day, I didn't write huge amounts on any one day. It just proves what I've heard successful writers say. Write every day. It keeps you focused and even if you only can write for a couple of hours, doing it every day you build up your word count. And that means your book is progressing.

When I went to the NaNoWri site to sign up, somewhere I read that to do this challenge you need to turn off your internal critic. That does help. Because the point with a first draft is to get the bones of the story. You can flesh it out or trim it down when you do your second draft. Or in my case, the 2nd, 3rd, 4th--You get the picture.

I'll go from the cottage to our rental tonight. Then Tuesday I'll pick up the dogs and come back down here. I want to set my goal at making 50K by Tuesday. That's probably unrealistic with the way things have been going. So my goal is to write 4K words between now and Tuesday night. That will leave 4K I need to write and I can do that even with Thanksgiving in the middle.

Just checked my calendar and one of the boys has a long orthodontist appt on Tues morning. Vowing here to take my computer and write while he's there.

Well, I have to go drive up the road again. I was just thinking that it's too bad there isn't a way to dictate directly to the computer as I'm driving. Then I thought about that. I'd probably have an accident.

Making Time

2006-11-17T22:42:00.000-08:00

The past week has been insane. I've been in the car more than out which is true of most mothers of school age kids I think. School, library, store, school, orthodontist, eye doctor. And they weren't things I could cancel or change because I'm trying to write 50,000 words in a month.

Then there is the stuff with the house, I've been to plumbing supply houses, electric supply houses, we've had to replace Christmas stuff so we could send in the receipts to insurance. To buy some winter clothes because I've learned mine have been deemed unsalvagable. We could just list these things but we are insured for replacement value and the kicker is if you don't buy the items to replace what you lost, they depreciate the items and don't give you the money it would cost to replace it. So I had to go shopping. I'm missing the female shopper gene or chromosome or whatever it is so it's not my favorite activity. But our Christmas trees and wreathes and many ornaments had to be thrown away and my kids want a tree. We've made the mistake of waiting until after Thanksgiving to try to buy a tree before and had trouble finding one. My husband is only home (in the same state) Friday through Sunday so we went today.

My mother's 80th birthday was Thursday. One of my sisters decided to have a surprise party at a restaurant for her. On Wednesday. A school night. An hour away from where we are living. My sisters aren't married and don't have kids. Wednesday was the day I had a doctor's appointment, had to take clothes to the laundromat, was squeezed in for an appointment at the plumbing supply and my younger two had eye appointments.

I thought about not going to the dinner. I worried about being too tired to drive back after the dinner which I knew would be at least three hours. I was afraid of having an accident. I didn't feel like making conversation with relatives. I worried that my sixth grader would skip doing his homework. I was exhausted and stung so tight I was afraid that the wrong word would make me snap.

My mom would have understood. She's worried about me. About us. But as I drove from one place to another barely making it to each place on time, I knew I had to go. It was her 80th birthday. We are so incredibly lucky that she is healthy, active and on top of things mentally. And she made time for us. Always.

My dad's blind so all the driving, all the running around, all the appointments were her responsibility. And she was his driver. His reader. The person who helped him search titles. Who picked up the baby being adopted from the hospital or the parent who couldn't keep it and brought him or her to the new parents. The one who told him what color the wires were in the circuit box so he could fix whatever wasn't working. Not because they couldn't call an electrician, or a plumber or send the lawnmower out for repairs. But because he wanted to do it himself and he enjoyed it.

She couldn't always be the one to pick us up from school but she always made sure if she couldn't that a neighbor could. She wasn't always home when we got there but she made sure someone was. And as the oldest, I knew she was torn. She loved (still does) my father and wanted to help him in any way she could. But she also wanted to be home with us. And I knew if I called, if I needed her she would drop everything and come.

My mother came to every concert, every open house, every recital. We always had a birthday party and she was always smiling and making sure it was wonderful for us.

I went because I felt obligated and I didn't want to hurt her by not being there. Once there, I enjoyed visiting with family friends and my cousins and aunt. And when my mother walked down the steps and saw all of us sitting there, the surprise and joy on her face made me so glad I'd made time. That we'd all made time for her in the middle of what was for everyone a hectic week.

My mother thinks my dad is amazing. He is. But so is she. And I never appreciated her so much as I do now when I'm frantically trying to keep up with everything I have to do and my kids have to do. As I juggled everything on Wednesday and stressed about everything I had to do the rest of the week and the next, I realized something. The only reason I can do it is because for my entire life she has been showing me how.

Now I need to tell her that.

Round and Round and Round She Goes

2006-11-10T14:11:00.000-08:00

Thanks for the good thoughts CMS and SDCB. Writing does put me in a happy place. I don't think I'd keep doing it if it didn't.

Got about 1000 words written last night and the first sex scene. Feel good about that.

Spent 3.5 hours looking at light fixtures, 2.5 hours driving and 2 hours looking at our furniture. It cleaned up better than I expected though a few pieces need to be refinished. From the fire. A lot needs to be refinished because it did before but we'll do that ourselves after we are back in the house.

I was supposed to go to dinner with the chapter board and our speakers tonight but the site of the dinner was changed to a place at least 30 minutes further away from me and I just can't do it. I might make it there but don't think I'd make it back. So I'm going to call and give my regrets. Instead I'll spend some time with my family. That's a good thing.

Contractor still hasn't called me back. Grrrr.

Days Like This!!!

2006-11-09T14:37:00.000-08:00

Days like today are the reason I've tried to write like crazy on the days I can. I haven't written a word today, not even in my notebook. Blah. I will write tonight though. First a look at a day in the life...

Boys off to school. Knew I needed to run by house first to move tape for closet. So didn't go exercise, just jumped in the shower. For some reason, water pressure wasn't good. I managed to wash off the soap and then dressed and went to brush my teeth. No water. None.

Okay, if I call the landlord he'll kick us out because I complain to much. But we need water. So I called his son who is supposed to do maintenance here and left a message. Said I'd be glad to do/check whatever if he'd tell me what to do/check. My husband is the one who got the tour of the workings of this place and he is of course in NY. And not answering his cell phone.

Called the contractor. Left a message. I need to ask him some questions about the things he told me I needed to do.

Called the mortgage company to find out why they haven't released money to the contractor. Got shifted to hold four times. After about 10 minutes of this I gave up. Called back cleaners who are trying to get the smoke out of our clothes. Got the answering machine again.

Drove to house. Talked to plumbers but forgot to show them where to put kitchen sink. Didn't remember until late afternoon. Drove back to the house but they were gone.

Called my brother, a contractor, to find out good measurements for a small walk-in closet. I'd ask our contractor but he hasn't called me back. Moved blue tape on floor. Will tell contractor where I want the door if he ever calls me back.

Went to look at bathroom/kitchen fixtures. Loaded with brochures. Went to look at appliances. Couldn't find what we were thinking about at the Sears outlet. Drove back to check on electric fixtures at store in our town. Walked in. No showroom. Turns out they've moved it. Did hear a funny story about a mouse storing catfood in the motor of a pick-up.

Drove to electric showroom. I need an appointment because we have lots to figure out. I don't even know if the electrical contractor doing our house gets things here. I don't know his name/co so I can call and ask. Because the contractor has not called me back.

Loaded with more catalogs and with an appointment for tomorrow am. Drove back to house (30 min.) to measure rooms and ceilings. I have the measurements but they are at the cottage 90 min away. While I was there I collected the mail. Spreadsheet from the cleaners. Most of my winter clothes have been deemed unreclaimable. Oh joy. Glad it's going to be unseasonably warm for a few days.

Picked up youngest for orthodontist appt. 45 min away. Scheduled middle son for next Friday. Another afternoon I won't get much written.

Came to library so I could check emails. Still have heard nothing about the water or from the contractor. So I may get home and have no water. Oh well. As long as I have electricity so I can write.

Tomorrow will be more of the same. This is why I tried to get ahead.

I will write today and tomorrow even if I only manage 200 words. I will write.

Almost to the Half-way point

2006-11-08T14:36:00.000-08:00

I uploaded my book to the Nanowrimo site and I've written 24,400 words. I've actually written a bit more but I did it while I was waiting to pick up the kids so it's in my notebook not on the computer.

I'm relieved at the word count because you never know what is going to happen in your life and it seems to be working out that I have several days a week when I can't write for any length of time. Like tomorrow. The contractor called today and said we needed to pick out our plumbing fixtures. Now. So tomorrow I'll be running to showrooms. After I blue tape where I want the closet in our room. I built it before and it was a little too small. Or I put the door in the wrong place or something. So I need to show them where I want it. Tomorrow. They've been twiddling their thumbs for months and but of course now that they're moving everything we need to do should be done yesterday. Figures. But at least we're seeing progress now.

And I'm at a good point in the book too. My plan. Instead of laying in bed thinking about the story when I wake up early, I'll fire up the computer and write it Then I'll have something written.

I'm in the middle of the first love scene and I'm bound and determined to finish that tonight. At least in the notebook. I can type it up when I'm too tired to be creative.

I want to write now! But I'm in the library and middle son will be calling any minute to tell me to pick him up at the Y. My poor characters are frustrated enough without me starting and stopping them like that.

Oyster Festival

2006-11-04T17:12:00.000-08:00

Today we went to the Urbana Oyster Festival. Sunny, cold and absolutely beautiful with all the boats in the harbor and the fall colors on shore. We got there early about 10 am which was great because the crowds weren't too bad yet. I got to talk with a representative from the Reedville Museum, someone from the Chesapeake Bay Foundation and an oyster gardener. Picked up a number of references and the person from the CBF referred me to a local author who has written a number of books on watermen on the VA side of the Chesapeake. I found him in a corner of his wife's shop with a pile of books. I bought several including one on the Civil War for my husband's birthday. He was telling me about another book of his that had quite a bit on the Civil War. I asked "Do you have a copy here?" He grinned and said he was still writing it. I can identify with that. He also gave me the names of two other authors who are experts on Va watermen.

I started one of his books on the way home. His name is Larry Chowning and his book is excellent.

I haven't written much today because this evening friends had invited us to an oyster roast/chili dinner. It was fun but cold. I'm skipping ahead in the book a bit because I had a brainstorm regarding the heroine/hero's meeting so I'm writing that scene while it is fresh.

Thanks CMS, Dee and SDCB for your encouragement. That 8800 word day is the exception rather than the rule with my writing but it helped get me going.

Trying to be disciplined here and go to write though with all the fresh air, walking, good food and cold today I'm feeling sleepy.

Update November 3

2006-11-03T19:47:00.000-08:00

I wrote 1000 words instead of 500. And my three day total is just shy of 14,000 words. I don't know how much I'll get to write over the next two days because tomorrow we're taking our youngest to the Oyster Festival then going to see his cousins and to an oyster roast. Sunday, the kids will want to spend some more time with their cousins and visiting friends and then we have to take the dogs back to the kennel and drive back to our temporary rental house.

I'm hoping to write at least 1000 words a day this weekend. Some words every day. That is my goal.

So far so good. Four weeks in November. 13,000 words a week equals 52,ooo words. About half the projected length of the book.

Now I'm nervous because it's gone so well to begin with.

Geez. Going to go to read about racing on the Chesapeake and then go to sleep.

Some of my friends have neat little graphs at the bottom of their blogs. I have no idea how to do that and this is not the month to try to learn. But they are cool

Nanovwrimo

2006-11-03T17:46:00.000-08:00

I think I may have added extra letters to this but any way I'm talking about National Novel Writers month. November 1-30 with a 50,000 word goal.

I signed up and started Nov 1. And wrote 8800 words. My book is up and running and I'm so happy and relieved. My goal is 13,000 words a week and I almost hit it in the first two days. Good thing because pesky stuff like having to pick out countertops, take care of kids and pets, call to check on who could drain our oil tank and remove it got in the way of writing today. But as soon as I finish this I'm going to write. Goal 500 words before I go to sleep.

If I don't write, I'm not happy. The more days I go without writing the less confidence I have in my ability to write. But my internal editor was working overtime and I'd started overthinking each and every word I wrote. So I did chores, and watched TV and read and avoided writing. Now, I've turned that sucker off and I'm just letting the story flow. Some days it flows better than others but even if I struggle one day as long as I write something then the next day the story flows better. And I'm happier. Which my family thinks is a good thing.

I'm lucky. My husband supports my writing and the kids do too. I'm sure they think oh well it's another of mom's enthusiams. Maybe. But this enthusiasm has produced two books in a year, the plots and outlines for the next 6 and I'm off and running with the third.

Writing keeps me sane. Now to work on my story.

The Ups and Downs of a Day of Research

2006-10-29T19:29:00.000-08:00

The island I'm using as a setting for my next book has a small museum. I was there several years ago and was impressed with their displays. This morning I checked to see if they had a website and low and behold they did. And today was the last day they were open for the season.

Thank goodness today the time fell back. I could make it over before they opened. Even stopped at a convenience store and bought a couple of disposable cameras since I'd left both our digitals at home when I left for the weekend.

It was a gorgeous day. Bright sun, gusting breeze, cool but not too cool. So I drove over the bridge onto the island and followed the signs to the motel/restaurant I remembered from summer family dinners out years (and years) ago. The road to the motel ran along the water and I pulled into a business (closed because it's Sunday) parking lot and popped out of the car to take a picture of the beautiful choppy water framed by the land across the bay. The gusting breeze almost blew the camera out of my hand and me off my feet. We're talking extreme gusts I'm not a small person.

Back in the car and wind around to the motel. The decrepant motel with the tilting docks and peeling paint. Now I vaguely remembered my cousin saying the place had been hit hard by hurricane Isabel. That was in 2003 I believe. I took some pictures, returned to the car hoping there was someplace on the island I could eat lunch before the museum opened.

There was. Good food, a nice waitress who grew up on the island and I just beat the after church crowd. Jotted down some ideas and impressions while I was eating.

At the museum, I pulled in just ahead of the docent and jumped out of the car like a kid at Disney World. She was great. Answered my questions, steered me to some books and asked when my book was going to be published so she could buy it.

Well, first I've got to write it and then I've got to sell it. She was really sweet. She still wants to buy it. I bet they'll carry it in the gift shop. After I write it. And sell it.

She directed me to some old houses on the island and told me how to get to the water. All the roads leading to the water are private and posted but she told me to ignore that. So I did. I had a great time meandering around, taking pictures of creeks and inlets and bays and beaches and houses.

When you're driving around someplace new or when I am, I always see a picture I want to take after I pass it. So I backtracked. A lot. There was this great old place but a bush, several bushes were in the way of the shot I wanted. Between the road and the gap in the shrubs was a ditch. Not too wide so I stepped over it.

The grasses hid the true width of the ditch. And the depth. I went up to mid-calf in cold water. The other foot went to mid-ankle because since I was already wet I was going to take that picture. I took a couple just in case. And went back across the ditch. It had gotten deeper. And I fell backwards. But only the back of my thighs got wet. Well, my socks and shoes and jeans too. Luckily I couldn't see the back of me so I continued to drive around stopping to take pictures. At the end of a road (yeah, private what's your point), I found the greatest place. Broken windows, torn screen, stripped of paint by the elements on a small harbor.

Parked the car and walked across taking pictures from every angle, shading my lens from the sun. At the edge of the harbor, I turned to shoot the front of the house. That's when I noticed the seagulls. Ever seen Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds. They were wheeling and diving just over my head. So I worked them into a couple of shots. And they followed me. I don't think any of them hit me with anything but then again I can't see my back.

I carefully backed up the car and avoided landing it in a ditch. They really have deep ditches on this island. All full of water from the rain we had Friday and Saturday.

Kept driving down one road after another. The island is only three miles by two miles but there are a lot of roads. Found another perfect harbor. And ran out of exposures. In both cameras. Okay. I'll be back next week because the lady at the museum is copying something for me. I'll bring the digital with me then. Because I still have to take pictures of the cemetaries and the old wharf.

The people on the island were amazing. No one yelled at me for driving down the private roads or taking pictures. And when I got lost the lady powerwalking just laughed and told me how to get back to the main road. I only got lost twice more. But I saw some more places I want to photograph. If I can find them next week.

I stopped a small deli/gift shop/ post office to buy the local weekly paper because there was an article in it the museum lady had shown me. To my surprise I had two quarters in my purse so I plopped them in the machine, found the right handle to open it on the second try and took a paper. Then I closed the strap of my purse in the box thing and couldn't get it out. Tug, tug. No luck. I removed my wallet, hid the purse between the paper boxes and crossed the parking lot. The proprietress couldn't open the box but she did give me change for a dollar. She even bought the extra paper from me because she said she'd forgotten to buy one. She did well on the deal because I did some Christmas shopping while I was there. $106 worth.

She has a great selection of wine for such a small store. I might buy a bottle next week. Today, I was having enough trouble without it.